I've not blogged for a while, for a few reasons. I think mostly because I'm lazy, but I'm also not in a great place right now. Why? The reasons are hard to explain, and I as usual I don't understand everything either. I think that the approaching birthday has something to do with it though. The last three birthdays have had me feeling pretty crap in the build up. My dad was confused about why, with this one. I'll be 23, but I've achieved a lot really. There has been visible progress since the last birthday. The degree, the job, the house, the adult life. They're just things though. I'm still as alone as I was this time last year. I'm still not jumping for joy at the prospect of reaching another day where I think about what I haven't achieved.
I just feel like I've gone backwards, since uni. My last birthday was good. I was happy on the day. Usual negativity during the build up, but then I went for lunch with some friends, and at the weekend my sister visited, and even though I still did some dissertation on the actual day I still had a good time. I was motivated to do well, and starting to get my life together and back on track. That's how I ended up with my good degree and my job. And now I have it all, and I'm getting worse again. I have no motivation. None at all. I'm behind on my portfolio work. I'm behind on other jobs I need to do. The house is a mess all the time. I dread work. I've lost contact with some more friends, and this time I know it's my fault rather than theirs like it usualy is. I've lost the internet as my escape. It's not that I'm really depressed right now, like I was at the start of the year, but I'm in a mess. I need to start being proactive again. It's just...finding a reason. Maybe I don't feel like I have one. At uni, I got my arse in gear because my placement made me realise that I wanted a job in the field. I don't feel like I'm aiming for something now, especially since I don't want to stay living here in this particular job.
There's been something else confusing me a bit, but I can't talk about that yet. The problem with this thing is that sometimes I just accept it for what it is, and it's no big issue, and then sometimes it causes a really deep confusion and questioning of a lot of things. I feel like things will become clear when something happens, but I don't think that will happen for a while.
Ugh. I just need to do things. Things that aren't tv, internet and work.
Sunday, 26 April 2009
Thursday, 16 April 2009
Upside Down
Some things really are just messed up. The mother of my cousin's son, pregnant by my brother's oldest friend. Pictures of the three of them together, her, him and the little guy, as though they were a family. She's a piece of work. He's just daft. I feel sorry for him. He'd be a good father to my cousin's lad, but it's not how it should be. Better him than some random I guess.
And what about my brother? I miss his ex. The one I spent years slating. I'd take her as a future sister in law over this new girl. He made a decision he'll regret forever today. I blame her.
Sometimes things just don't feel right. The way they happen, the things they cause. I wish there was a reset button for some days. I hope it all works out.
And what about my brother? I miss his ex. The one I spent years slating. I'd take her as a future sister in law over this new girl. He made a decision he'll regret forever today. I blame her.
Sometimes things just don't feel right. The way they happen, the things they cause. I wish there was a reset button for some days. I hope it all works out.
Monday, 30 March 2009
New Sci-fi?
I was looking up some stuff about Dollhouse today, and I came across an interesting article. "What show is your new Battlestar?" BSG is over, Atlantis is over, the new Star Trek film just won't be Star Trek...so I do need new sci-fi.
Stargate Universe sounds more interesting the more I hear about it. That article says that it'll be the "gritty" Stargate. More like BSG. It's funny that it keeps getting compared to Voyager, but in the sense that it'll be darker and more character based than SG1 and Atlantis, it could turn out to be the DS9 of the Stargate franchise. That will certainly be no bad thing. I'm still a little wary of the fact that they're aiming it at a younger audience, but Robert Carlyle is a great casting choice and I'm sure it won't make much difference. Oh, and it's also great to read that Richard Dean Anderson may appear in the mid season two parter!
Virtuality is another show mentioned in that article that really sounds interesting. Okay so Ronald D.Moore writing it does have something to do with my opinion there, but the idea is definitely good. People going mad on a ship, written by him, sounds like it will definitely be worth watching.
The other one I'm interested in is obviously Caprica. How it all began! Caprica should be interesting if nothing else. My only concern is that they say you won't have to have watched BSG to follow it.
Three new series to look forward to, and The Plan at the end of the year too!
Stargate Universe sounds more interesting the more I hear about it. That article says that it'll be the "gritty" Stargate. More like BSG. It's funny that it keeps getting compared to Voyager, but in the sense that it'll be darker and more character based than SG1 and Atlantis, it could turn out to be the DS9 of the Stargate franchise. That will certainly be no bad thing. I'm still a little wary of the fact that they're aiming it at a younger audience, but Robert Carlyle is a great casting choice and I'm sure it won't make much difference. Oh, and it's also great to read that Richard Dean Anderson may appear in the mid season two parter!
Virtuality is another show mentioned in that article that really sounds interesting. Okay so Ronald D.Moore writing it does have something to do with my opinion there, but the idea is definitely good. People going mad on a ship, written by him, sounds like it will definitely be worth watching.
The other one I'm interested in is obviously Caprica. How it all began! Caprica should be interesting if nothing else. My only concern is that they say you won't have to have watched BSG to follow it.
Three new series to look forward to, and The Plan at the end of the year too!
Friday, 27 March 2009
Other television
Time for a post BSG post, mostly because I'm on my second day off sick and I've been catching up on things. Obvious spoilers ahead.
Heroes
My problem with Heroes is that it seems like they make it up as they go along. All my favourite shows seem like they knew where it was going from the start, even if they didn't. BSG, Farscape, DS9...the continuing story always made sense and flowed well. They hadn't decided that Ellen Tigh was the final cylon until they started writing season 4, but you can believe that they'd known since day 1. Heroes just seems so unstructured. Changing who does and doesn't have powers, changing the nature of people's powers, not being consistent with people's characters. I enjoy every episode, but the overall story is lacking something. It needs more focus, and to feel like it's really going somewhere. Also, they really need to give Peter and Hiro their proper powers back. I don't like that direction.
Desperate Housewives
In contrast, I love where this is going. Edie's death was a little predictable, since I knew she was leaving. I expected Dave to kill her though, and it almost would have been better if he had. As it is, we still get to have some kind of climax where everyone else finds out about Dave's past and the thing with Mike all comes out. It's a real shame that Edie's gone though. Definitely one of the best characters. All in all this series has been pretty good, and my only fault is that the American networks are being stupid, as usual. Episode, break, episode, longer break, episode. break. It's frustrating, and it can't be good for ratings.
Scrubs
While I do think that Scrubs has gone on for a couple of seasons too long, I'm still enjoying this season. It does seem a bit final, and I hope that ends up being the case. It would be too strange without Zach Braff. It's still funny, and maybe even as funny as it ever was, but it isn't quite the same. I think it's really noticable that there are episodes where not every character is there, and I don't like that.
Dollhouse
The more I watch it, the more it grows on me. Helo (as he will always be, screw Paul Ballard) is a great character, and Eliza Dushku does a great job being someone else every week. This week's big twist was that Helo's neighbour is a sleeper active. I did not see that coming, and it's kinda sad that he's getting involved with someone who isn't real. Great twist though. I really, really hope this series gets it's chance to have another season. It is definitely worth a watch.
Lost
One of the things I love about Lost, even though I can't stand it in Heroes, is that they change everything every season. Well, something happens to make things change. Everyone living in the 70s and working for Dharma was something I did not see coming in a million years. I really can't wait for it every week again, and it's been a while since I've been like that over Lost. Sayid shot young Ben Linus! But Daniel said they couldn't change the past? Maybe he was always meant to shoot him, and he survives? Interesting! One thing I'm not looking forward to is the Jack/Kate/Sawyer/Juliet love quadrangle. I was always for Sawyer and Kate over Jack and Kate, but I like Juliet and I wouldn't like to see Sawyer just go after Kate again.
There are definitely things I really want to know in this series. Where the hell is everyone else from the original plane? Rose and Bernard etc? What happened to Daniel Faraday? Why did Sun, Locke and Ben end up with the other plane people instead of with Jack, Kate, Hurley and Sayid? Confusing! But good confusing.
Primeval
This is something I've been convinced to watch rather than a new thing I download weekly. After episode one, I don't think I'm going to end up rushing with it. It's alright, just a bit daft, and the effects aren't great. Some people might say that it's no more daft in it's idea than all the other sci-fi I watch, but it just seems it to me. I don't think Britain is very good at sci-fi and fantasy, with the exception of Dr Who and Torchwood. There's something Torchwood like about Primeval, but it's clearly not as good. The young guy and the S Club 7 girl aren't great actors. The hunter/tracker guy is way too pretty for that. Ben Miller is playing a really annoying and predictable role. I might stick with it because I think the overall idea is good, and because it's something else to watch. It's not that great though.
Skins
I can't believe I forgot this! The series has been brilliant, it really has. It's impressive that they find groups of new actors who are this good. The finale was a little disappointing though. Great episode yes, but I sort of expected something involving the rest of the cast too. I guess they got their finale last week with the ball, but still, when you compare it to the season 1 finale, it just wasn't as...explosive. That served as the middle of the original cast story, and had story lines for Maxxi and Anwar, Sid and Cassie, Tony and Michelle, Tony and Sid, Tony and Effy, Chris and Angie, and didn't Jal get off with Posh Kenneth? It involved everyone and left some stories open for the second series. Tony getting hit by a lorry, for a start.
I'm not saying that the season 3 finale left nothing to think about. Are the guys really all friends again? Will Cook be alright with Freddie and Effy? Will that even work? Where are they going on the stolen boat? Like I said, really great episode, just expected a bit more, and expected more of the cast to be there.
Battlestar Galactica
No I haven't watched Daybreak again yet, but I read Bear McCreary's blog, and I just wanted to say again how amazing this series was. Maybe I'll watch it again later.
Heroes
My problem with Heroes is that it seems like they make it up as they go along. All my favourite shows seem like they knew where it was going from the start, even if they didn't. BSG, Farscape, DS9...the continuing story always made sense and flowed well. They hadn't decided that Ellen Tigh was the final cylon until they started writing season 4, but you can believe that they'd known since day 1. Heroes just seems so unstructured. Changing who does and doesn't have powers, changing the nature of people's powers, not being consistent with people's characters. I enjoy every episode, but the overall story is lacking something. It needs more focus, and to feel like it's really going somewhere. Also, they really need to give Peter and Hiro their proper powers back. I don't like that direction.
Desperate Housewives
In contrast, I love where this is going. Edie's death was a little predictable, since I knew she was leaving. I expected Dave to kill her though, and it almost would have been better if he had. As it is, we still get to have some kind of climax where everyone else finds out about Dave's past and the thing with Mike all comes out. It's a real shame that Edie's gone though. Definitely one of the best characters. All in all this series has been pretty good, and my only fault is that the American networks are being stupid, as usual. Episode, break, episode, longer break, episode. break. It's frustrating, and it can't be good for ratings.
Scrubs
While I do think that Scrubs has gone on for a couple of seasons too long, I'm still enjoying this season. It does seem a bit final, and I hope that ends up being the case. It would be too strange without Zach Braff. It's still funny, and maybe even as funny as it ever was, but it isn't quite the same. I think it's really noticable that there are episodes where not every character is there, and I don't like that.
Dollhouse
The more I watch it, the more it grows on me. Helo (as he will always be, screw Paul Ballard) is a great character, and Eliza Dushku does a great job being someone else every week. This week's big twist was that Helo's neighbour is a sleeper active. I did not see that coming, and it's kinda sad that he's getting involved with someone who isn't real. Great twist though. I really, really hope this series gets it's chance to have another season. It is definitely worth a watch.
Lost
One of the things I love about Lost, even though I can't stand it in Heroes, is that they change everything every season. Well, something happens to make things change. Everyone living in the 70s and working for Dharma was something I did not see coming in a million years. I really can't wait for it every week again, and it's been a while since I've been like that over Lost. Sayid shot young Ben Linus! But Daniel said they couldn't change the past? Maybe he was always meant to shoot him, and he survives? Interesting! One thing I'm not looking forward to is the Jack/Kate/Sawyer/Juliet love quadrangle. I was always for Sawyer and Kate over Jack and Kate, but I like Juliet and I wouldn't like to see Sawyer just go after Kate again.
There are definitely things I really want to know in this series. Where the hell is everyone else from the original plane? Rose and Bernard etc? What happened to Daniel Faraday? Why did Sun, Locke and Ben end up with the other plane people instead of with Jack, Kate, Hurley and Sayid? Confusing! But good confusing.
Primeval
This is something I've been convinced to watch rather than a new thing I download weekly. After episode one, I don't think I'm going to end up rushing with it. It's alright, just a bit daft, and the effects aren't great. Some people might say that it's no more daft in it's idea than all the other sci-fi I watch, but it just seems it to me. I don't think Britain is very good at sci-fi and fantasy, with the exception of Dr Who and Torchwood. There's something Torchwood like about Primeval, but it's clearly not as good. The young guy and the S Club 7 girl aren't great actors. The hunter/tracker guy is way too pretty for that. Ben Miller is playing a really annoying and predictable role. I might stick with it because I think the overall idea is good, and because it's something else to watch. It's not that great though.
Skins
I can't believe I forgot this! The series has been brilliant, it really has. It's impressive that they find groups of new actors who are this good. The finale was a little disappointing though. Great episode yes, but I sort of expected something involving the rest of the cast too. I guess they got their finale last week with the ball, but still, when you compare it to the season 1 finale, it just wasn't as...explosive. That served as the middle of the original cast story, and had story lines for Maxxi and Anwar, Sid and Cassie, Tony and Michelle, Tony and Sid, Tony and Effy, Chris and Angie, and didn't Jal get off with Posh Kenneth? It involved everyone and left some stories open for the second series. Tony getting hit by a lorry, for a start.
I'm not saying that the season 3 finale left nothing to think about. Are the guys really all friends again? Will Cook be alright with Freddie and Effy? Will that even work? Where are they going on the stolen boat? Like I said, really great episode, just expected a bit more, and expected more of the cast to be there.
Battlestar Galactica
No I haven't watched Daybreak again yet, but I read Bear McCreary's blog, and I just wanted to say again how amazing this series was. Maybe I'll watch it again later.
Wednesday, 25 March 2009
Proud
He did the right thing. I was worried that he was like someone else we both know, but he isn't. He's much more of a man, and he did what had to be done rather than drag it out. He took the tough choice instead of the easy one, and I'm proud of him.
Monday, 23 March 2009
Battlestar Galactica - Daybreak
Battlestar Galactica truly is one of the best things to ever be shown on a television. The final episode was just perfect. It's great that it was still able to be unpredictable and surprising right up to the end.
Starting off, we always knew that Adama, who always makes the right call, would go after Hera. Was never sure they'd get through it though! I also suspected that Boomer might do the right thing in the end, and she did. Wasn't sad when Athena killed her though. Some things were more shocking though. The moment when you realised that Baltar and Caprica Six could see each other's Head Cylon and Head Baltar. Angels! They really were. Nothing more sinister than that. Baltar was never evil and I knew that, but it was good to see him doing the right thing in the finale. He got it. The man of science who never believed in religion was the man with the faith at the end.
And Starbuck! She died after Maelstrom, on Earth. The Starbuck who came back was like an angel too. She wasn't really there. Well, she was, but...she was something different. All the mythology and spiritual stuff was great. The Opera House scene was just brilliant. That had been there since season one. Roslin, Athena, Caprica, Baltar and Hera, all playing out the parts from the vision that we'd seen for four years. I'm not into religion and would have been kind of disappointed if it'd all been about the Christian God, but it wasn't really. God, or a god, or the gods of Kobol, or some other divine force. Something bigger than us, and that was all that mattered. Perfect.
Of course the biggest twist was that our Earth and the Earth of their own mythology were not the same place. I was seriously confused when they landed in Africa, and there was grass and animals and primitive humanoids. They just chose to call it Earth because Earth was the dream! Our Earth was just named after the real Earth! And they were our anscestors! Perfect.
I didn't really cry because I didn't watch it alone, but I probably will next time. Roslin's death, and the Admiral leaving forever, and Starbuck's departure, and Sam going into the Sun with Galactica...all beautifully done. The happy bits too were worth a tear in places. Tigh and Ellen together again, Baltar going back to his roots with Caprica, Helo surviving, finding this new planet to start with. The flashbacks worked well to make it all that more emotional too.
I loved how it finally ended. In our time, the angel Caprica and angel Baltar with Ron D. Moore in the scene, discussing whether it will all happen again, to Jimi Hendrix's All Along the Watchtower. I really can't wait for both the DVD release, and after Bear McCreary's brilliant season as far as the music goes, the soundtrack too.
I'd also like to add that Ronald D. Moore is a complete legend. Battlestar Galactica + many of my favourite DS9 episdes...can't get much better than that.
Starting off, we always knew that Adama, who always makes the right call, would go after Hera. Was never sure they'd get through it though! I also suspected that Boomer might do the right thing in the end, and she did. Wasn't sad when Athena killed her though. Some things were more shocking though. The moment when you realised that Baltar and Caprica Six could see each other's Head Cylon and Head Baltar. Angels! They really were. Nothing more sinister than that. Baltar was never evil and I knew that, but it was good to see him doing the right thing in the finale. He got it. The man of science who never believed in religion was the man with the faith at the end.
And Starbuck! She died after Maelstrom, on Earth. The Starbuck who came back was like an angel too. She wasn't really there. Well, she was, but...she was something different. All the mythology and spiritual stuff was great. The Opera House scene was just brilliant. That had been there since season one. Roslin, Athena, Caprica, Baltar and Hera, all playing out the parts from the vision that we'd seen for four years. I'm not into religion and would have been kind of disappointed if it'd all been about the Christian God, but it wasn't really. God, or a god, or the gods of Kobol, or some other divine force. Something bigger than us, and that was all that mattered. Perfect.
Of course the biggest twist was that our Earth and the Earth of their own mythology were not the same place. I was seriously confused when they landed in Africa, and there was grass and animals and primitive humanoids. They just chose to call it Earth because Earth was the dream! Our Earth was just named after the real Earth! And they were our anscestors! Perfect.
I didn't really cry because I didn't watch it alone, but I probably will next time. Roslin's death, and the Admiral leaving forever, and Starbuck's departure, and Sam going into the Sun with Galactica...all beautifully done. The happy bits too were worth a tear in places. Tigh and Ellen together again, Baltar going back to his roots with Caprica, Helo surviving, finding this new planet to start with. The flashbacks worked well to make it all that more emotional too.
I loved how it finally ended. In our time, the angel Caprica and angel Baltar with Ron D. Moore in the scene, discussing whether it will all happen again, to Jimi Hendrix's All Along the Watchtower. I really can't wait for both the DVD release, and after Bear McCreary's brilliant season as far as the music goes, the soundtrack too.
I'd also like to add that Ronald D. Moore is a complete legend. Battlestar Galactica + many of my favourite DS9 episdes...can't get much better than that.
Saturday, 21 March 2009
Development
I want to post about last weekend in London at some point, because it was brilliant. I've been meaning to do that all week, but now I'm actually on here, I have something else on my mind. There are two people that I got all wrong. I automatically assume that guys who look and act like one of them just won't want to know me at all. Wrong. He's a good guy to hang out with. The other one I was worried I'd end up wanting too much from. He's still closer to my type than other guys in my life right now, but some things he's said lately have made me see that he could be the guy friend I've not had for a long time. I missed Simon after he left, and I guess that was similar. He said something to me that I've never felt was true coming from other "friends", and despite the fact that I'm now overanalysing myself again, it was really good to hear.
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